A selective memory
I have - suspected catalyst to my eventual mental and physical decline - a very selective memory. Until recently I was convinced that I had simply a very bad memory, and would offer the idea up as fodder to help constitute the anecdotal hodge-podge that is peoples’ image of me. The advantage of being known to have a poor memory I imagined to be similar to those of being under the age of five, or being suspected of senility; no hard feelings over missed anniversaries, or forgotten deep-and-meaningfuls and the like. However, it seems everyone I tell has their own memory problems, and never retain knowledge of my handicap. People seem to delight in (to my mind crudely over-affected) surprise at the nature and girth of things I am capable of forgetting. “But how can you forget that THAT?!?” They say with their hands scandalously poised in front of their agape mouths.
Of course now I know better. I’ve noticed a trend that manifests itself most significantly when casting my mind back nostalgically to lost loves; I remember the love, not the loss. This has led me to near disaster, threatened in the form of drunken late-night calls to people who - although remembered warmly as yesteryear-lovers - are in fact very contemporary haters. Thusly so I am pressed to reassess my mnemonic malady. Indeed, I remember the walks on the beach vividly, the near kisses and soft moments are etched into my being, and how could I forget her affectionate name for me, whispered cooingly beneath a starry sky. And in the end I suppose it’s for the best that the miscarriage of such a love-affair should not haunt me, though I can’t help thinking - how will I learn?
July 12th, 2007 at 4:13 pm
there was this very friendly man. his problem was psychological, not physical and therefore not covered by the health insurance.
there was this bright woman, not so bright mind. quotes only from ‘i am sam’ reviews and says little to nothing else. now moans a lot.
and there was once a little boy. or so much never said any words but to a special lover friend, a growing girl. she killed him for kicks.